Rufus Oba Unveils Prelaunch Book "Choose To Lead", Emphasises On Role Of Women In Nation Building -

Coastal News

Mr Rufus Oba grew up with an elder sister and two female cousins, so was shielded from household chores during his growing up as a child, leaving those chores to the women of the house. He was so pampered and loved by his Mum and Dad.

Mr Rufus Oba who was born when his daddy had advanced in age, was the proverbial Joseph of his family. His Dad named him after his own personal name, despite the fact that he had other grownup siblings. As a sign of respect for his Dad, his siblings and family members always calls Mr Rufus not by his first name, but he was called by the name Kala Daddy. No one dared called him Mr Rufus, neither could he be talked down upon too or scolded anyhow because they felt talking hard at me was a sign of disrespect to his father.

His father loved western education so much that immediately Mr Rufus had developed a reading culture, even though his father was not that learned as such, he however loved education that he was ready to go the to any length in order to encourage him.

His parents were still amazed how their little son Rufus did not end up becoming a professor despite his love for reading books. Little Rufus always read anything printed or written wherever he finds one. His father was a respected old man with a kind loving heart, he was generous to a fault, a community lawyer and spokesperson, a traditionalist, skilled fisherman and hunter known to be about the best in his generation, a warrior and proud Okrika man who was easily attracted to a lot of beautiful women which made his soft hearted mother to back out and parted ways with his father immediately after given birth to young Rufus. His father was a friend, confidant, adviser to the King then; Sir S.P.U. Ogan, Amayanabo of Okrika kingdom.

On the other hand Mr Rufus was so loved by his very pretty young mother who daily showered him with love. She got remarried with the only condition that young Rufus must live with her. He was never allowed to go near the kitchen as a young boy because washing of plates, cooking were specifically reserved for the ladies in the house. All Mr Rufus did was to sweep to keep his environment clean.

Food was never a problem in the house, and the complaint from most people that lived in the house was that they cook too much food and different meals prepared at different times of the day. Mr Rufus was pampered though, he felt like a spoilt child who was never wrong though was wiped like most children of my age by his mother but never at all by his father. All his mother was interested was that he focused on his studies and read, this was evidenced in his grade. Mr Rufus had his younger one handle all the domestic chores, even his younger brothers are very great chefs.

His mother’s love for family and friends was magnanimous as people were fed at all times, she was a giver , very compassionate, loving and caring and she ended up giving all she had which ruined her entire business and subsequently it affected him in life. He learnt from his parents the very act of giving and never to hold back. His mother had told him about giving quoting “Nobody can harm or kill you if you are a giver that God will always fight for you’.

HIS PHILOSOPHY

In every area of human endeavors there is a woman with the ability and influence to shape new ways of thinking and doing things. Women work their butts off to reach their dreams but a lot of the times circumstance don’t allow that to define their dreams.
Yes, women have made inroads, there is a lot to do, the Government needs to figure out a how to bring more women into the Economic space, in proverbs 31.12:14..The Bible.

Referring to the woman as being industrious by nature, caring and loving. “She will do him (NIGERIA or wherever she finds herself) good and not evil all the days of her life. She seeketh wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands she is like the merchants ships she bringeth food”.

No nation can make any significant progress without women, so for Nigeria to get better women have to get political appointments/offices and I am glad to say women like Dora Akinyuli, Ngozi Okonjo iwela, Oby Ezekwesili were great assets who changed, touched, influenced and impacted lives and society with their positions while they served politically in the various Governments and there are so many women with potentials waiting to be discovered or recommended.

A lot more are doing well and better than most men in their chosen professions, for instance in the Banking sector, where three women are Chairmen of the Boards doing profoundly well; Ibikun awosika, Osaretin Demuren, Mosun Belo Olusaga, give these women an opportunity to serve as Governors, or legislators, or even as president of this country and I can bet that the masses, which make up a better percentage of our population will greatly feel the positive impact and of course it will flow to the society at large.

He believes women are rising up to the task of speaking up and they must be listened to and respected too. If women can run the homes successfully, take care of us, men inclusive, then the Government and our society must involve them politically and economically.

THE BOOK: CHOOSE TO LEAD

The younger generation of women needs Role Models to emulate he says, which is part of the reason for his Book titled: CHOOSE TO LEAD. specifically for women who are winning in all spheres of life.

He referenced a quote from the South African demonstrators of 1956 demanding an end to the infamous apartheid legislation that forced Africans to carry documents to enter a so called White area. “hear this women as they were arrested. “You strike a woman, you strike Rock and you will be crushed”; So true even in Nigeria in 1927 some women resisted the colonial masters oppressive taxes ,they demonstrated and got good results when the men at the time seemed helpless. The Aba women riot was a success even though many women lost their lives.

In his opinion, he observed that in most professions the women were more outsanding than the men folks.

He cited the law school exams of 2014, out of about 251 first class recorded Women had over 220, that’s no mean feat. Great achievement and show of dominance. He recommends seriously that women be given opportunities and chances in our political space. He sees women as dogged, organized and hard working.

He said most of the good Women he had known and either worked with or interacted with have been through enough struggle to last a lifetime, the strength of a woman is often passed on to her children of which he gives credence to his beloved mother Mrs Dinah Tolofari, probably the strongest and most resolute woman ever known in his youth.

He remains grateful to his mother who instead of merrily cutting him off from her new family took him up and instead she showed him patience and love. She was always there for him whenever he was in the bottom of the dark, lonely, barred of despaired, she showed compassion, What others could have easily passed judgment upon, which they did but instead his mother sent me prayers and advice which he treasures them to this day and her advice to him then always keeps reverberating in his head; “NEVER BE CRUEL TO WOMEN BECAUSE THEY CAN HELP TO MAKE YOU A SUCCESS OR KILL YOU AND SEND YOU TO HELL FASTER THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE”in the pressure of the day.

Whenever he looks up and see the green fields, he believes and hope that one day in less than 20 years from now, women will become Governors, Speakers of houses of Assembly at the states and at the National if women.
He opined that women in this context, especially this generation of young women need mentors, role Models, achievers, winning women to look up to, copy or emulate which formed part of his motivating factor in writing this Book. According to the Holy Bible, in the book Galatians 6.9..it simply admonishes us to keep doing good and not be weary and in due time God will reward them.

He hopes to encourage these selected heroines in his book that their good deeds are recognized and appreciated, every human being loves to be appreciated and that’s natural, that even as he appreciates these women in his book, they will in turn be glad to do more and others too would want to do emulate their good deeds.

He charged and energized the youths to seize the moments, like these women and many others did before them, according to the slogan of the “Youths of our time”.

His Book is challenges the present crop of youths that women can achieve and rise to any level they want to be through hard work, dedication, determination, the right decisions, and being disciplined to follow their dreams, desires and aspirations.

His Book will prove to this generation to bring out more heroines such as Dora Akinyuli, Hilda Dokubo, Linda Ikeji, Ibinabo Fiberesima etc
God willing, Mr Rufus will have this great feats recorded and frozen in the pages of history Books to prove that it is possible for women to be at the Tops of their class or chosen fields of endeavors and to serve humanity nationally and internationally in any capacity….
Queenscot Academy